Love and Marriage

What is it in the air these days that makes love and marriage enemies? Why are so many families falling apart and left in the ruins of divorce? Now I’m not so naive as to think that all marriage is supposed to be perfect all the time. I know that there are real issues that people face that make marriage impossible, but I find it hard believe that over a million marriages today have no choice but to end in the ruins of divorce.
One hundred years ago marriage started in your early teens and divorce was something almost unheard of. Back then people faced stresses and a life harder than we could imagine yet they made it a priority to hold their families together.
"The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together." -Robert C. Dodds
I guess by now it’s obvious that I’ve come from a broken home. Between my parents and step parents there are eight failed marriages. I can’t bring myself to understand how so many “loves” can turn into so many heartbreaks. I know that love comes and goes in your dating years, but have you thought that we could be forming a pattern for our lives? That our concept of “move on when things get hard” will eventually be applied to our future relationships, regardless of a vow? We’re setting ourselves up for failure.
It may seem cold hearted, but I’ve learned one thing from the marriages in my family: what not to do. I understand that love isn’t all that a marriage is about, and I accept that with the knowledge that marriage also isn’t always easy. But there comes a point when I have to ask that if love isn’t the foundation of the marriage then why even try? It doesn’t have to be the starry-eyed, Romeo and Juliet kind of love. It can be the comfort and friendship of a shoulder to cry on. But either way if there’s not love at the end of the day, what’s the fighting really worth?
Why have so many people stopped fighting for the relationships they once vowed into? Why are so many people walking away from their families just because things got hard?
I’m not saying that divorce is wrong, and like I said earlier, at times it’s needed, but why do so many people take their vows so lightly today? Why do they enter into a marriage with the thought that if when the honeymoon phase is over and it’s not really love, they can always get out?

You know, so many people spend their lives looking for love. But rarely do they fight to keep it.
Looking at my parents marriages I’ve vowed to myself that I wasn’t going to end up like that. My earliest memories are of my parents fighting. And all I hear from their marriages now is more fighting. But they never try to work through the problems to real issues behind them. My dad is the kind of person who doesn’t show emotion, perhaps from the thought that it’s weakness, but instead of facing any problem he would rather just pretend it’s not there. Does he see the way his approach is only allowing more hatred and emotion to fester within the real problem to explode and tear his marriage apart? And my mother, she's "married" to a man who loves her more than life itself, but she’s bitter. She’s the kind of woman who has to have assurance that she is in control. She fights and argues about little things to avoid the real pain she feels. She pushes away those who love her, hurts those who love her the most. Perhaps it’s her way of saving herself the pain…? In both cases all I see is a mess of emotions and problems. I’ve learned the ways to NOT confront a problem in a marriage.


I’m young, but even so I’ve always tried to approach my relationships with an understanding that this person is different from me. There will be problems. There will be fights. But I’ve always been the person to fight for the person I love, weather it be a boyfriend or a best friend. I am not immune to divorce but I believe I’ve trained myself differently when approaching a problem. I’ve instilled patterns within myself that I can apply to my future and maintain the bond and love I will find.

I hope that if your marriage is falling apart you’ll at least consider fighting to keep it. Try to find the underlying problems and work through them together. Love and marriage may be hard, but I believe with all my heart that it’s worth it.
Ecclesiastes 9:9 "Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you in this world. The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil."

Science and The Bible

"The creator and God of the universe is the God of science-the author of scientific laws that govern his word."

"Understanding is the reward of faith. Therefore, seek not understanding that thou mayest believe, but believe that thou mayest understand." -Augestine


"Scientific research continues to infold the wonders and mysteries of our universe. Intresting, there is one book that has anticipated many of these scientific facts. That book is the Bible."

Excerpt from "When Dreams Come True"

Leslie Ludy is one of the people i look up to the most in the world and i've read several of her books. i was going through some papers and i found my favorite quote from her book "When Dreams Come True" and felt i would share it with you.

"A letter represents something far more than a kiss ever could. it evidences thoughtfulness and the gift of time. While a kiss can prove tender, it must overcome the stigma of impulsivness to truly display love. A letter on the other hand, when written in the spirit of ardor and romance--even if it never mentions passion--strokes the heart deeper than any form of physical touch. A kiss cannot be felt again and again from great distance; but a letter can be read and reread thousands of times. A kiss only fimiliarizes the lips with the physical body of a lover. A letter farmiliarizes the heart, mind, and soul. Maybe that's why God decided to write us a letter."

i read this "When dreams come true" years ago and have still hung onto this quote. it seems to touch me everytime i read it.
i hope you found the comfort and inspiration that i did in it:)

THE Name

Many of us, no matter how long we've been attending a church, have heard the phrase, "there is power in the name of Jesus." All things in the name Jesus...
have you ever stopped to consider what this means? have you ever stopped to think about why we use the name of Jesus as a weapon, a refuge, or even calling a friend? We use the name, and all its glory because when we hear the name of Jesus, we are reminded of all that he has done for us.
matthew 27:50-51 "Then Jesus shouted out again, and he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtian was torn in the Temple from top to bottom."
This amazing thing Jesus did. this is what saying his name should make us remember. i have made you contemplate why the name is so important because of this...
take a moment to think about what God thinks, what he rememebers when he hears your name.
Will he be proud of all you've done to further his kingdom, or disappointed because you choose to turn from him and love the world? WHAT DOES GOD THINK WHEN HE HEARS YOUR NAME?
i understand that when you weigh your life to others you may come up short, but i'm not asking for that. in no way am i asking you to compare yourself with anyone...i am simply asking you to weigh the good against the bad, then decide which way the scale is tipping.
ecclesiastes 7:1 "A good reputation is more valuable that the most expensive perfume..."

When God consumes your heart you will begin to change in ways you didnt even know needed changing. you will begin to love people and to love life. you will begin to better yourself as well as try to better the world around you. so consider this when you decide what god thinks when he hears your name.
if he were to come to your school, your job, your home; how would the people he meets describe you?? in some circumstanses this may be a harsh reality to face. maybe you are saved but still retain anger and bitterness that affects the way you communicate with the people in your life..that is effecting your reputation and god can see it all. remember that god is always with you, he knows your every move, every word, and every thought. he knows your reputation better than you do.

so if you want to reinvent your name, consider this:
god is the source of joy and the holder of everlasting, neverending grace. ask him into your life and repent daily. consider the downfalls of your life and pray for them often. confess to be a christian and take time to ponder on exactly what god has brought you through.

this message has become so important that i share because i myself had to do the same thing just this morning. i cleared my mind and really focused on what God brought me through, the very gates of hell stood before me and God come to save me. he never gave up on me. and i am determined to make my reputation one that counts to the lord not the world. and i pray that you too realize that Gods not giving up on you either and your reputation may be the very thing that can open someones eyes to God himself.

"You may be the only Bible some people read." -Chris "P.C." Moore